p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
