Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
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