UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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