His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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