This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
