why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
