i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
