haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
