Its about making memories worth repressing
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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