I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
