The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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