Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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