thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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