he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
