i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
