is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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