he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
My vagina just recognized that song.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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