Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(973): View more from New Jersey

look no pants

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(303): View more from Colorado

well if you came here i would keep you awake :*

(1-303): View more from Colorado

did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay

Fav 6 946 1766
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(908): View more from New Jersey

Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.

Fav 17 8417 2372
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(713): View more from Texas

I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.

Fav 34 2160 4719
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(602): View more from Arizona

The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."

Fav 12 3692 1460
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(765): View more from Indiana

Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.

Fav 8 1572 1059
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(949): View more from California

Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.

Fav 10 2625 1140
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.

Fav 12 1085 2658
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(425): View more from Washington

I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!

Fav 4 1304 579
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