its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
