Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
what day is it and did you see me today?
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize