Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
