This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
