apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
