Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
