did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
