dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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