ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize