Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
How many fucks given?
0.12846
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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