I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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