i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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