No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
