How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
