areolas are like halos for boobs.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
