Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize