He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
The air was thick with penises
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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