careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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