If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
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