Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
