oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
