A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
