Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
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