went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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