Don't you send me to vm
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
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