So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Randomize
