i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize
