maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize
