Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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