she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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