her vagine was all disorganized.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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