Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
